Top 5 reasons I hate numbered lists

I can't stand number list articles. I'm not quite sure why. I certainly read them when I am researching something, but never do I casually click on a number list article. I feel like they are selling something and know that number lists get more clicks/views. Because of this, I feel like I want to rebel and NOT click on those lists just because it's a marketing technique. I actually do this for a lot of marketing techniques that I recognize. I just rebel against them because I don't want anyone to influence me.

1) I don't want to be influenced
2) You can't tell me what to do!
3) It's the norm, and I usually look for the path less traveled.
4) They do not always match up to my rankings
5) They give the crappy websites the ability to get more page views by making you click "Next" and each number on the list is on its own webpage.


I think what I have discovered by writing this article is that I don't like to be influenced by marketing, and that is why I don't like number lists. Do you like number lists? Did you click on this article because it had a number in the title? Let me know in the comments if you like or don't like number lists.


Here is an article about why we humans are drawn to lists by someone who actually knows what they are talking about.
https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/fulfillment-any-age/201109/7-reasons-we-7-reasons



Cheers!
-Ryan

Parents. Not all are the same

Six years ago, yesterday I lost my Mother. She left this world before we could reconcile our relationship. As I watched the clinicians stop administering life-saving functions and call the time of death I wailed out loud how sorry I was to not have been closer to her. If I would have apologized just 5 min earlier maybe she would have heard me. Instead, I carry this guilt with me every day.


Presently we have a situation in our house that I don't think is common, but it's not that rare because I have heard of other people helping others get on their feet. We took in a 17yr old girl that showed up on my porch in April. It was chilly. She didn't have any shoes on. She asked if she could talk to my son, her friend. I won't go into the specifics of her family issues, but I'll try to explain what I am doing, what I am thinking, and how I am planning on getting them at least talking to each other again.


What am I doing? - I will change the names, but the situation is that Jane was kicked out of her house by her Father and Stepmother, the Doe's. Then Jane came to live with me and my family. I am trying to shield this young woman from some of the things I feel are hurtful. When people speak out of frustration or anger often times they spit vile things in an effort to make themselves feel better. I try to be the main contact, but of course, I can't control all of their communication with their daughter. Once, after the girl had been living with us for six months, they threatened to pull her out of our home. After the threat, Jane was super scared and anxious that she might have to leave. It was then that I had to put my foot down and told the Doe's that they will not threaten or hold anything over Jane's head. It wasn't fair to her, and after living with me for so long we had gotten her a bank account in her name. We had the address changed on her ID. For all intents and purposes, Jane's primary safe residence was at my house, with my family. No Sheriff would pull her out of my home without a Judge's court order, and by the time a Judge would do that she would have already turned 18.


What am I thinking? - I carry guilt for never reconciling with my Mother before she died. So in this situation, my goal is to get her talking with her Father and Stepmother in an attempt to save some semblance of a relationship. When my Mother was still alive there were family events where we couldn't avoid each other. Holidays and family get-togethers were awkward, to say the least, however, both of us still made the effort to be cordial to each other. I feel like this is, for lack of a better word, a skill that adults develop. In our adult lives, we are often forced to work or deal with people that we didn't necessarily get along with. So I feel like we have a teaching moment to teach Jane how to deal and work through awkwardness so that she can learn to be an adult. The trouble has been to get the Father and Stepmother on board. 


How to reconcile? - I don't know. I'm asking YOU for help. I only have SMS messages as a form of communication with the parents. This is beneficial as well as detrimental to opening up lines of communication. We can take our time to respond, hopefully without being influenced too much. But the downside is that we can choose not to respond, or not reply to a question. The result is that often the communication is just one-sided. Do you have any suggestions on how to open up lines of communication? Any ideas on how to help this young girl salvage her relationship with her parents?





Thanks for reading
-YonK

Randomness #1

Often I have random thoughts that do not warrant their own ramblings. So today is the day I scratch two of these off my list.

Alcohol

Alcohol. Is it addicting? We know there are alcoholics, but what about binge drinkers? Even the ones that do it once in a while. I don't remember where I heard it, but someone said: "What if a hangover is just your body going through alcohol withdrawals?"

That comment has stuck with me for some time. I know that I do not metabolize alcohol well, or efficiently. So hangovers in my 20's were tough. After getting that out of my system I rarely drink now. I just can't handle those mornings after where my whole body hurts and I don't want to get out of bed. Is that a consequence of alcohol withdrawal?

Flags at Half-Mast

I hold the United States of America in a high regard and I fully respect our U.S. flag as a symbol of this great country. I feel so very lucky to have been born in this country. 

I often wonder about the presidential decrees to put the flag at half-staff are getting too frequent and thus taking away of the reverence we all have for the symbolism of flying the flag at half-mast. It seems all too frequent that we have a disaster, a celebrity dies, etc. I feel like that takes away from the reverence when a government official dies. Take Sen. John McCain for example. When he passed away I almost forget that the flag was supposed to stay at half-staff until interment. But that is also not the only thing I forgot such as, the Senator was laying in state for a week before his burial.

I am certainly not saying we shouldn't lower our flag for celebrities or tragedies, or other remembrances, but I do wonder if we lose some reverence in doing so.

Thank you for your kindness in listening to my ramblings. Feel free to comment below. Comment about this post, another post, or this project. I would be happy to hear from you.

All my best

-YonK